By: Katie Adamchick

With more and more couples commonly moving in together before marriage, being pregnant while getting married does occur with a number of brides. I spoke with Tracy Saunders about her beautiful wedding and how plans changed once she found out about her pregnancy.

Tracy and her fiancé (now husband) Dave, had talked about getting married and already had a house together; when they found out that she was expecting. Since the wedding was being pushed up by several months, Tracy used this as an opportunity to have a small, intimate wedding, with immediate family only.

“I never liked the idea of walking down the aisle. I cringed at the idea of saying my vows in front of 100+ guests and having them look at me as I walked down the aisle. I was thrilled when I could get away with a small ceremony. It was natural, intimate and FUN!”

Tracy and Dave had a very private ceremony at her mother’s home and then took off a few hours later for Cuba, to enjoy some time away with each other. This didn’t stop Tracy from wanting to party it up later though. “I wanted to be pregnant for the wedding, but not the reception,” she commented. The reception will be held in May 2013 and their daughter Evelyn will be in attendance!

So, what to do if you are planning a wedding while you are pregnant? If you are already engaged and you want to change the date of your wedding, you will need to call your vendors right away, but understand that unfortunately you may loose your deposits. That said, the sooner you call and discuss the situation with your vendors, the better. In some cases they may be able to put the deposit into your new date, as long as you still book through them.

Certainly, you can plan a wedding quickly and get married in your first trimester, but many brides prefer to marry in the second trimester. This is traditionally the time when mothers-to-be start announcing their pregnancies to people outside of family and close friends and any morning sickness is usually gone. Brides still feel good enough to have some fun and party and a little less encumbered, as they may feel in their third trimester.

If you are purchasing a wedding dress while pregnant, keep in mind that you will grow! This is why many brides rush to get married in their first trimesters. That said, if that isn’t a possibility, don’t try and hid your pregnancy. You have chosen to get married while pregnant, hopefully not solely BECAUSE you are pregnant. Your future baby along with your husband, are likely the most important people in your life. A wedding is a celebration and so is a baby. Don’t try and hid your growing belly under a corset! There’s a good bet it won’t work anyway.

 

That said, everyone wants to look their best on their wedding day. If you can avoid getting married in the third trimester, you may want to, since you want people focusing on you, not just your stomach and wedding dresses can be uncomfortable for non-pregnant people, much less people walking around with the equivalent of a watermelon under their shirt!

Having your reception during your wedding while pregnant will be a personal call. For people who have dreamt of a large ceremony, if everyone is already there, then it may make the most sense to keep the party going! If a smaller, more intimate ceremony is what works best under the circumstances, then that is what you should do and you can choose to have a larger reception whenever you like (or a smaller one, for that matter…no rule says it has to be huge). As Tracy put it, “To allow a bigger crowd and to ensure I was able to have a few drinks and bust a move on the dance floor, we delayed the reception. ALSO, we thought it was important that Evie could be at the party with us.”

Most importantly, have fun on your wedding day. If it was an unplanned pregnancy, it may not look like what you expected, but that doesn’t make the day any less special. Some people in your life may feel compelled to make jokes (shot-gun wedding?) or comments (so, you’re not the most religious couple, I see), but remember that they are not the important ones here.

At the end of the day, every couple needs to do what is best for themselves and their future offspring. Every woman deserves to have a blast on her wedding day! “Evie is the reason things played out as they did…and we couldn’t be any happier!” Tracy mused.